by Ken Canfield, Ph.D.
Back-to-school season marks a major shift in your grandchildren’s routines. Their world gets busier, more structured, and more focused on learning. You may not be part of their daily homework routine, but that doesn’t mean you’re on the sidelines. There are contributions you are uniquely equipped to make that could help set them up for success this year and into the future.
Even though school may feel like a daily grind to your grandchild, things could happen this year that shape the course of his or her life — in academics, relationships, faith, or a new passion. So how can you contribute?
The big principle: Share your educational heritage.
You probably already do this in other areas — like family stories, traditions, and values. Education is no different. Research shows that children with a strong sense of heritage and an involved grandparent have a stronger foundation. This is especially true during adolescence, as they take bold steps and work to establish their identity.
Here are four ways to bring this into their school years:
Tell stories.
Who was your favorite teacher, and why? In which subjects did you excel, and which ones challenged you? What memories do you have from each grade along the way? Maybe it’s the math teacher who finally made fractions make sense, or the time you bombed a speech and learned to prepare better. These stories help your grandchildren see that education shaped who you became, and it will likely do the same for them.
Put it in writing.
Some of your most meaningful stories and pieces of encouragement can be written down and sent in a letter or given in a note or card. Handwritten messages are rare these days, which makes them feel special. Your grandchild can hold it, keep it, and return to it. There’s something powerful about seeing their name at the top and your signature at the bottom. A note wishing them well at the start of the school year, or a story about your own experience with a tough subject, can mean more than you realize.
Stay tuned in.
Your unique perspective on life and history will likely open avenues of connection with your grandkids through various school assignments. They may need to interview someone of a certain age or with a unique experience, chart their family history, or compare inherited traits while studying genetics. Teachers are often proactive about helping students explore their personal and family histories. You never know what conversation or lesson will ignite a passion or become a foundation they build upon as they choose a vocation or establish goals that guide them throughout life. And if you’re able, consider volunteering at their school. Even a few hours can give you a window into their world. Be ready to engage.
Ask good questions.
Showing genuine interest goes a long way. One of the most valuable questions you can ask a child during the learning years — kindergarten all the way through graduate school — is simply, “Tell me about what happens at school.” Have them describe the events of their day in as much detail as possible. Probe further and ask about favorite teachers, friends, frustrations, and challenges. These questions and your genuine interest will open up conversations and let your grandchild know that you really care.
Don’t forget: teaching is part of your role as a grandparent, even if it often happens in the background. Every story you share, every question you ask, every note you write can create reference points for future discussions you might have with a grandchild during the next family gathering, phone call, or one-on-one outing together.
Experience is a great teacher, especially when children can learn from the stories of those who came before them. But too often it doesn’t happen because those experiences haven’t been passed on in a meaningful way. Let’s take the opportunity this school year to be bold in sharing our life and history with our grands. Your educational heritage is part of that story, and it matters more than you may realize.
In what ways are you involved in your grandchild’s education? Share what works for you so other grandparents can benefit. Just go to our Facebook page here.
