by Jay Payleitner
adapted from his book, A Grand Way to Live
I thank my God every time I remember you.
– Philippians 1:3
Sometimes being a grandparent is a real challenge. Maybe at times you feel alone or discouraged or just plain tired. (We all feel that way sometimes.)
To combat those times — or maybe prepare for them — here’s an exercise that takes your thoughts and prayers for your grandchildren and translates them into joy and, sometimes, action:
Choose one grandkid at a time and simply think about them until you smile.
Think about their eyes, hugs, laugh, frowny face, thoughtful face. Imagine their future. Imagine the next time you get to see them.
If you’ve chosen a four-year-old grandson or granddaughter, it’s easy. Your smile will come quickly. At that age, they are surprising energy-filled goofballs that say very silly and sometimes very profound things.
Newborns also promote instant smiling. That’s because they are all potential. The future has no limits. As they absorb the sights and sounds of the world, you can tell they are learning something every moment. Babies and toddlers learn more in one day than you have in the last six months. Right?
Middle schoolers are also going through moments of self-discovery. Plus, moments of rejection, frustration, and confusion. That’s the middle school experience. With that understanding, smile because you know there’s light at the end of the tunnel.
Thinking about older teens or young adults may leave you scratching your head. They are facing decisions you never even considered. Technology and culture have come so far. Still, you should be able to consider their heart, mind, and soul and find reason to smile.
Or maybe this exercise is hard.
Some grandparents may even be angry reading this devotional. They have grandchildren they don’t know or can’t know. Or a grandchild has become a burden on the entire family because of some bad decisions. You may feel helpless, but you are not! You’re still here. They’re still here. What if you reached out and entered their life in a whole new way? You and them on a park bench. You and them taking a road trip. You and them finding the right doctor, social worker, or spiritual leader. Many young people just need someone who loves them to be the wind beneath their wings. This may be your most important calling ever.
Finally, maybe you cannot smile because one of your grandkids has left this world, and you don’t want to think about him or her. As grandparent, that’s another gift you can bring to your family. Be the one who is not afraid—at the right time—to remember that precious life and express love and appreciation for what they meant to so many people.
This grandparenting exercise is a private endeavor. But the result is hope, appreciation, and joy that can overflow onto the entire family. Discovering or rediscovering your smile is a chance to clear away some of the darkness and fog, so you can envision a bright future for those young people you love so much.
What about you?
In your quest for smiles as you imagine your grandchildren, accept this prayer from the book of Romans: “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Romans 15:13).
Read more from Jay at Grandkids Matter here.
Jay Payleitner is a best-selling author of A Grand Way to Live, Hooray for Grandparents! and more than a dozen other books on marriage, family, and doing life right, including 52 Things Kids Need from a Dad, 52 Things Wives Need from Their Husbands, and What If God Wrote Your Bucket List? He and his wife, Rita, live near Chicago, where they’ve raised five great kids (and now have eight grandkids) and have loved on ten foster babies. For information on booking Jay to speak at your next event, visit jaypayleitner.com.
