by Dr. Ken Canfield
You all know it’s Mother’s Day this weekend, and I hope all grandmothers get some affirming, quality time with your children and grandchildren, even if it has to be over the phone or a video chat. Maybe you’ll even get your favorite meal and a few gifts. You deserve to be honored for the dedication, the wisdom, the faithfulness, and the unconditional love you bring to their lives. Enjoy your family on your day!
And as you’re looking forward to that, I hope you’ll also remember some other mothers in your life …
Especially your grandchildren’s mom.
The negative stereotype says there’s tension or even animosity between women and their mothers-in-law—and often between women and their mothers. And sure, maybe some of that stereotype is valid in some families. But as grandparents, we can do a lot to change that and maintain a positive tone with our adult children and in-laws. And occasions like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day provide us with opportunities for that.
The practical suggestions here are probably pretty obvious. It’s all about encouragement and support for those busy parents. Those moms have surely been through a lot during the past few years as COVID interrupted established routines and ideas about “normal” family life.
So, to remind you about what might be obvious, here are a few suggestions about how to carry this out with your grandchildren’s mom:
Encourage & affirm her on Mother’s Day.
I’m a firm believer that there are no perfect parents, but all parents need encouragement. So notice and affirm her for the good that you see—her devotion, her gentleness with the kids, her ability to keep their busy lives organized, her knack for encouraging and affirming them … whatever good things you notice. And it’s a good idea to always be looking for things to praise in her.
Make a commitment to make her life a little bit easier … or a lot easier. So many grandparents are already great at pitching in to help with your grandkids—everything from caring for them some days each week, picking them up from school and other events, and just being an extra source of positivity in her kids’ lives. Keep up the good work, and look for one or two more ways to help out during the next week.
Pray for her.
Our good friend Teresa Kindred wrote about this just recently, and it’s a great reminder. Praying for our grandkids’ mom every day is a great gift for her, and it might be what she needs the most. (You can read more from Teresa at Grandkids Matter right here.)
How do you bless and affirm your grandkids’ mom? Please share your ideas and feedback at our Facebook page.